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Barfathon 2008 (If you need me I will be asleep under my desk)

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I woke to hear pounding feet, whimpering and then raucous vomiting in the bathroom. Even after I got to the bathroom it took my half-asleep brain a few seconds to register what was going on. There was Lucy, bent over the toilet, throwing up what seemed to be everything she’d eaten in the past month. I pulled her hair away from her face while she finished and dampened a washcloth to wipe her face. I asked whether she had thrown up in her bed (she hadn’t) and if her belly still hurt (it did) and I brought her out to the couch with me.

This was midnight and she proceeded to barf or dry heave every 10 minutes for the next three hours.

To her credit, Lucy is a champ when it comes to vomiting. She knows when it’s coming and gets herself to the toilet and does not make a mess. It’s no coincidence though; she spent all of last summer throwing up as she popped molars. She is home with Hub now, happily chattering away about how she “throwed up” and nibbling on some toast.

Needless to say, I am exhausted, but I dragged my butt in to work because I need to have 18 Performance and Development discussions completed before the end of the month. And since I only intend to be here through 6/23, I need to get cracking.

I am unsure how to handle Bud and the attitude he has developed recently. Everything is an argument. He is constantly telling me “I am so mad at you right now!!”. Yeah, he’s 4. Last night, when I told him it was time for bed, he argued. When I spoke to him about arguing with me, he whipped me in the face with Lucy’s blanket, in sheer anger. What does one do in that situation? My only urge was to burst in to tears because my baby boy wanted to physically hurt me. I kept it together and marched him in to bed and told him that I didn’t even know what to do with him. I told him he’d better go to sleep with no problems or there would be no Tae Kwon Do for 2 weeks. Hub disagrees with using Tae Kwon Do against him and says I should have taken away toys or TV. I still don’t know what to do. He was a pisser again this morning, demanding orange juice when I’d already poured him apple and I ignored him. He refused to drink and I refused to switch out the juice. I ended up buying him milk and 2 donut holes on the way to daycare and I felt like a schlub. What kind of lesson am I teaching him? And also, hello Saly, choose your battles. I totally could have poured him orange juice. I’m feeling helpless because clearly I don’t know what he needs.

8 responses »

  1. Poor Lucy! I’m impressed with what a throwing-up champ she is.For Bud, I don’t know if this will work but I can tell you what my parents did that worked very effectively for my sister and me. They made a list of privileges that we had, and the list stayed on the fridge. They were increasing order of importance and personalized to us individually (so my sister had TV as more important on her list because she watched it a lot more than I did). Our gymnastics lessons were the very last thing on the list. Every time we did something that had a consequence, we lost the next privilege on the list. It re-set every week.I know it sounds complicated, but it really worked for us because consequences were clear and consistent and we always knew what was coming. There couldn’t be arguing and the limits were extremely visible. It made it a lot easier to think, even at age four, “If I do this, then I’ll won’t get to do that.” It was very effective.

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  2. I went through this very same thing with K. when she was 4 and I was expecting E. I think she was testing me more than usual because I was tired and slow (and because that’s what 4-year olds do). Things got much better after E. was born.

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  3. Oh man, I’m sorry. This all sucks SO BAD.What a tough little cookie Lucy is!

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  4. Oh, poor Lucy.Oooooh, poor you. Just what you don’t need right now is attitude from Bud. I’m sorry!

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  5. Oh, she is such a barfing pro!”What works” varies SO MUCH from kid to kid, but one thing I try for anger/attitude issues is to say that if they can’t be around other people right now, they need to be by themselves. Kind of like time-out, but not “x minutes in your room,” more like “you can come out when you can speak nicely and treat other people well” (I say it in a kind and understanding voice, like “this happens to all of us sometimes, and this is what we do when it happens.” This also buys ME time by MYself when I’M not speaking nicely!)

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  6. Cutting teeth induced barfing? Wow. At least she makes it to the toilet. Hope she’s feeling better soon.In other news: YOU WON!! TWICE!! Yay you! I’ll email you later.

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  7. Wow, Lucy is not even 3 yet, right? What control! I am doubly impressed.Also, what is up with these boys lately? Of course, I think my situation is way way wayyyy worse than yours. Maybe it is just all the new changes. Brother was really antsy before Jelly Bean was born. But after, he did calm down quite a bit. And I am going to steal Jess’s idea about the list! Yeah!

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  8. Poor Lucy, I hope she feels better soon.

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