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Suck It

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Today started at 1:42 AM, thank you very much. Lucy had wet the bed, for the second time in her life, and was very upset about it. So there was half asleep sheet and clothes changing and cleaning up before it was decided that she would just come back to bed with Hub and me. Lucy contorts herself in an odd fashion when she sleeps, so Hub had her feet in his face for a while, and I had her bony elbows. Needless to say, I didn’t sleep well, and I am pretty exhausted.

I’ve felt like I’m in a funk all week so far. It’s grey, dreary and cold. I dread driving home from in the dark where it’s easy to get caught up in negative thoughts or scary “what if” scenarios. By the time I get home, I am physically and emotionally drained. And then there is dinner, baths and laundry to deal with……

I’ve been making it to bed by 11:30 or so and can barely drag myself out of bed in time to shower and start a bottle for the baby before we leave. I’ve worn jeans and sweaters to work every day this week because the thought of stockings and heels seems too overwhelming. It is typically frowned upon to see management in jeans all the time, but everyone is so wrapped up in their own crap that they haven’t noticed.

I’m hoping that I’m just adjusting to the winter weather and time change, you know? I want to be curled up under blankets on the couch all the time, drinking cocoa with loads of whipped cream watching TV or reading books, and clearly, that is not an option.

We do have something fun planned for this weekend though, which involves a trip in to Rochester for a birthday party, and then driving out to Syracuse for dinner and “Lights on the Lake” which is a drive-thru light display at a state park. We are also taking the kids to pick out their Christmas ornaments on Friday night.

Hopefully the fun filled holiday activity will snap me out of it, but until then, today can suck it.

7 responses »

  1. i can’t imagine what your day must be like. I can’t barely get up and get myself to work day in an out, as well as chores. You have a hubby, three small ones and a full time job. I admire you and I wish I was closer to be able to help out, even with a hug and some hot cocoa. Love you. Paprika xx

  2. What I keep trying to remind myself is that the shortest day of the year is only a couple weeks away. And then it will start staying light longer again. And that’s not so bad, right? Right?

  3. I hope your fun weekend is just what you need!

  4. I think it’s that your Cocoa and Blankets Bucket is low, probably completely empty—and yet there’s never any chance to refill it.

  5. I hate the dark at 4:30. It’s not right, we need sunlight! I get down myself as the days get shorter and shorter, but as Jess said…they will start to get longer soon; even if it doesn’t feel like.

  6. I agree about today, which is why I created a Christmas meme to try to cheer myself up. Tag, you’re it.

  7. Ugh. How crappy for you.I do hope that your weekend helps cheer you up. 🙂


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