So I went to the doctor yesterday and here is the good news—I’ve lost 5lbs! The bad news is that my clothes still don’t fit. I have been increasingly disgusted with the way that I look lately. Yes, I have had 3 kids. Yes, I have a thyroid disorder and have almost no metabolism. I don’t feel like this is a sufficient excuse for looking this way though; for feeling this way. I’ve been able to deal with the weight gain in the past; but now looking at my face, and how fat it looks, I can’t even deal. Yes, I hate the way I look.
So what do I do about it?
The obvious answer is to exercise and eat better. The obvious problem is that I am ridiculously lazy. I have good intentions of getting up and exercising in the morning. I have good intentions of eating a healthy breakfast. And then, I just don’t. Because the other options are more convenient.
How exactly do I break this cycle?
After Lucy was born, I started going to the gym at 5am, at least 3 days a week. It worked out well and I made good progress. I’ve since cancelled my gym membership because once the nice weather started up again, I stopped going. I told myself “why the hell bother??” since I knew we wanted to have another baby anyway.
What is the convenient and painless way to lose weight? In order for it to work do I need to go all gung ho kamikaze on it?
So here I am faced with the facts:
• I look terrible
• I feel terrible about myself
• I am running out of excuses
• In the past 15 years, I have almost doubled my weight
• If I ran in to someone who I haven’t seen since high school, I would be embarrassed.
It’s apparent that something needs to be done. I need to kick myself in the ass and get moving here. I want to be healthy. I want to look better. I want to feel better about myself. (honestly, I wouldn’t mind being considered a MILF…lol)
I just need to know HOW!