We have kids. Two of them actually.

They cry, scream or fight 98% of the time.

It’s usually Caitlyn with the crying. It could be any number of things. You took her shoe off perhaps, or she can’t buckle something herself. Maybe she just needs to play with the knife in your hand or take the cap off your too-full bottle of water. It always starts the same- her face gets red, her eyes well up, and she shrieks until she finally dissolves in to hysterical sobs. Ed and I sometimes catch each others eye, and I know the same thought goes through our minds. The words I spoke not long after she was born. “What the hell were we thinking?” Then, as quick as it started, it stops and she moves on to something else. She inevitably gives me her 3-tooth jack-o-lantern smile, and I fall in love with her all over again.

The screaming is all Eddie. It’s his sole form of expressing displeasure. Sometimes it’s a low grunt, like maybe you offended him by asking how his day was (not good apparently) or asked him to please take his peanut buttered bread off of the couch. Other times it’s a long drawn out scream, and for good reason. “No TV tonight Eddie.” , “You have to take a bath tonight Eddie.” He always succeeds in winning me over later though, no matter how bad our day was. He always gives me 5 kisses and hugs for bedtime and tells me “I love you very very very very very MUCH!” (Much, appropriately, is a high pitched shriek)

There are things about each of them that I love so much. The wonderfully perfect shape of Caitlyn’s mouth and the way that when she smiles she does it with her whole face. The curve of Eddie’s nose, and how sweet and caring he is toward his little sister. I’ve heard parents say my whole life how their kids being cute saves them sometimes. What saves them from punishment, or the wrath of Mom though is pure unadulterated love. For all of the stress, and screaming and fighting, what it comes down to is that I love these kids so much. And I want them to be happy.

In my mind, today is still the weekend. It’s still the weekend even though I’m at work (on a bank holiday) and am getting slammed. In my mind, I haven’t gorged myself on doughnuts or drunk almost half of a “Box O’Joe”. I’m home and toasty with my kids, admiring the near foot of snow in our yard. Maybe even playing in the snow again today like we did for an entire 30 minutes yesterday.

I am actually at work though. Our call volumes have been horrendous, so we’ve been open for the past 2 holidays. There’s actually a lull in activity right now, and I need a minute away from it all. It’s been crazy.

We had a wonderful weekend, Saturday being a lazy day where nothing got done. The kids both have colds, again, and weren’t feeling so well. Ed worked and the three of us laid around. The kids (and I actually) stayed in their jammies all day. Ed came home just in time for their nap, and he and I napped as well. The kids slept almost 3 hours and Ed got up at some point, but I passed out cold, and slept until Caitlyn woke up. Eddie slept so soundly that he peed in his pants (“I’m soaked and wet Mommy” …not soaking wet.  ) I was actually out of it the rest of the night, being thrown off from sleeping. Ed went back to work and I didn’t make it up much longer than the kids.

Yesterday, we played in the snow. We were out for all of half an hour, but it seemed like an eternity. The kids had a really good time, and once again, Eddie took a really long nap. Caitlyn, not so much, but I didn’t sleep so it was ok. I actually finally took care of my salt and pepper roots, that I don’t think a 28-year-old should have. But anyway… I clipped coupons and cleaned up around the house a bit. We ordered chicken for dinner and watched NASCAR. Ed left for work again around 6:30. I bathed the kids, and got them in bed. Caitlyn threw a huge temper tantrum. That girl, I’m telling you. She begs me to sit on the potty, but then won’t sit on it. Then she screams when I put her diaper on. She’s started slapping my arm when she doesn’t like something. She’s trying my patience. I didn’t get Eddie in bed until 9:00 and I watched Desperate Housewives. After feeding the cats and shutting down the house, I went in to check on them both. Caitlyn was sound asleep, but Eddie rolled over to look at me. I asked him if he was ok. “Yes”, he said, “But my feelings hurt.” Of course, I brought him in to bed with me. He just melts my heart sometimes.

So, overall, it was a very ordinary weekend. Here are some of our snowy…and not so snowy pictures.

My Darling Boy

Eddie fell last night. He wasn’t even screwing around which I think makes it worse. I had gone in to the kitchen to make a cup of tea and he was leaning over the arm of the couch to see what I was doing. In less than a second, he was on the floor. Screaming hysterically, “My head! My arm!”

I picked him up and immediately looked at his teeth. I have a major paranoia about my kids knocking their teeth out. All the teeth are there and the mouth isn’t bloody. He buried his head in my shoulder and I took him in to the kitchen where the light is better and where he was farther away from his sleeping sister. I asked him to show me his teeth again and that’s when I saw it. The larger-than-a-golf-ball goose egg on the right hand side of his forehead.

I really caught me by surprise.

I screamed.

“Oh my god!!”

This worked wonders for his level of hysterics.

“What?!?!” he screamed back in an alarming sob.

Yeah, I wasn’t as cool and calm as I should have been at the beginning. I explained that he had a bump on his head. He told me that he landed on Caitlyn’s buggy (which on a side note, she pushes around looking for her baby saying “beeebeeee, are you??” in the cutest sing-songy type voice) I called the dr’s answering service. I called Ed. My Father-In-Law came out of his room to stand around and keep saying “Wow! Shit! I never seen anything swell up dat fast”

Eddie calmed down pretty quickly and we played “count mommy’s fingers” and “what color is…” and “ok, just one more time, make big eyes for Mommy” for about 30 minutes. He wouldn’t let me ice it, but he did accept M&M’s and milk. When I asked him what his name was, he told me “Eddie” and proceeded to spell his full last name for me. (I don’t know he could do that prior to suspecting that he had a concussion) I was pretty sure he was fine.

The Dr. called back and assured me that unless he was googley eyed and barfing that he was probably fine. He told me in his think Indian accent that “this was all part of a little boy growing up” (but for some reason I think Cait will be worse…)

Eddie was in fact fine, and took some Motrin for his headache. He then milked his booboo situation in to being able to sleep on the couch until I went to bed, and then eventually coming to bed with Ed and me.

He was fine this morning and enjoyed telling EVERYONE at daycare how he fell off the couch. (His teacher also told me that Eddie broke their toilet seat yesterday, but that’s a story for another day) Hopefully, CPS won’t be at my door this evening.

Raising kids and being a mommy through thick and thin is the hardest job I’ve ever had. And I wouldn’t trade it for the world.

“Sunday”

Yes, it’s Sunday. It’s been a long weekend. I actually went out on Friday and on Saturday which 100% never happens.
Friday was my work christmas party. We have it at the end of January every year, probably because it’s cheaper. I hung out with all the girls and guys that work for me all night and had a great time dancing the night away. I danced so much that I no longer feel bad about only making it to the gym 2 times this week. (The weather has been complete crap, especially at 5:00 am when I’ve been going.) Best part of the night…..I won a whole rack of booze! You get chinese auction tickets just for walking in the door, and I only put a few in that bag, but I won.
I ended up being up early with the kids yesterday morning because Ed left for work at 6:30 am…blech blech blech. i ended up parking them in fromt of the tv and dozing for a while, but we ended up having a nice day. We visited Ed’s mom in the hospital and had lunch in their cafeteria (Ed loves cafeteria food). Then last night, FIL watched th kids and Ed and I went to dinner and saw “Smokin’ Aces”, which was good. Another late night though; we were in bed at 1:30 am.
So, I was up early again this morning, because God-forbid the kids sleep any later than 7, even after they’ve been up late, but whatever. Ed and Eddie are at the train show now, and Cate is taking her nap. I too should be napping, but I’m too coffee’d up.
Work completely sucked last week and I’m not looking forward to going back. A lot of issues, nothing I’m up for talikng about right now; It’s just all too stressful. The mandatory overtime was cancelled though, so that’s a plus. It’s an extra plus for me, since I don’t even get paid for it, being salaried and all.
I don’t know, I feel like I’ve been on a roller coaster these last few weeks. I haven’t scheduled any vacation time yet this year, so maybe I’ll do that soon.
Ok, back to work before the girl wakes up.

I have to tell you honestly, my kids are driving me crazy. I mean 100% insane. If it’s not one it’s the other, but usually they team up.

Caitlyn has been a walking temper tantrum since we were at the dr. on Tuesday. I don’t know if she’s still feeling ill from the shot (she had the chicken pox one, and I know that one can get sore), or if it’s the molars, or what. If she’s not screaming “No! Mine!” and snatching something from you in a fit of rage, she’s crying hysterically “Wa Wa Mommy” (I want Mommy, which is the phrase Eddie uses every time he cries) with gigantic crocodile tears—like the world is ending. I think I could take it if something was really wrong, but ridiculous things set her off—dropping her juice cup, me breaking a cookie in half rather than giving her a whole, her blanket being on the love seat (where she can actually get it), or not being able to brush her own teeth. She’s taking me over the edge.

And then there’s her brother……

Eddie is good all day at day care. I hear about how great he is every day, great listener, great eater, very happy. He changes 100% as soon as I walk in to his room to pick him up for the day. He refuses to put his coat on, pulls his shoes off, jumps up on the table, spills out bins of toys…you name it. I’ll admit that some days he’ll give me a hug first, but then it’s always the same. I end up having to yell at him or threaten him before we even go over to get Caitlyn. Yesterday, he ran out of daycare in to the Business Park, and right out the door all the way to the car. What am I supposed to do? I had to carry Caitlyn and run after him like a crazy person. So I ask him ”do you like it when Mommy is mad? Do you like it when Mommy hollers at you?” The answer to both is no. I’ll admit, once we get home he’s good, and happy. Shows me his good manners. Everything is good until bedtime and then the shit hits the fan. He’s up and out of bed, and needs water and this and that and everything under the sun. Needs to sit on the couch for a few minutes. He’s never asleep before 9:00 and usually it’s even 9:30.

I don’t know. I’m writing this and I hate how it sounds. I have the 2 greatest kids on the planet, not a couple of hellions. I guess I just wish that the evening was sunshine and roses, you know, we snuggle on the couch and have a snack and laugh and sing. I guess it doesn’t work that way. I know it will be better, that this is just a certain block of time in their childhood, and that we definitely have more good times than bad, but right now it’s never-ending.

I also want to mention that going to the dr. on Tuesday made Eddie so nervous that he pooped 2 times while we were waiting, and then threw up all over the exam table while the dr. examined him. Who knew he had a nervous stomach?

Ok, I promise to share happy stories tomorrow. Tonight will be a good night.

Here’s something I don’t even believe- I have been to the gym 3 times this week. !! 3 TIMES !! I’ve actually gotten up and have gone at 5:30 AM, right when they open. This way, I’m not sacrificing my time with the kids in the evening, since they’re still sleeping. The funny thing is, I actually like it. I’m not just showing up, doing a few things, and then leaving like I did in the past. It’s like I actually have something that is mine-my own piece of time. This is going to be good.

In other news, Eddie’s 3rd birthday was Sunday. Where the time has gone I don’t know, because I swear he was just my 10lb 2oz roly poly newborn. Any now, he’s this three plus foot tall walking, conversation holding person. His obsession lately has been the school bus, and what’s going to happen when he goes to “big boy school”. (This of course is 2.5 years away) “And the bus will come to my house, and I will get one it then the bus driver will take me to the big boy school and then I will walk in to school and then later I will get back on the bus and the bus driver will take me home and then I get to go back tomorrow. Right Mommy? Riiiiight??” He makes my head spin. He’s also watched the same Mickey Mouse Clubhouse episode twice a day every day for the past 2 weeks. He thinks it hysterical because it’s called “Goofy on Mars” and he purposely says “Goofy on Yarjs” and laughs hysterically when we correct him. He’s a weird kid.

Caitlyn is nearing 18 months old and has actually been in her terrible 2’s since she turned one. If you even look at her the wrong way, she loses it. She wants what she wants, when she wants it and you’d better not get in her way. When she does get her way, she is the sweetest happiest little girl you could ever imagine. She talks as well as Eddie did at her age and loves to sing and dance, play with her tea set, jump in Eddie’s bed (which she can now climb in and out of by herself) and zoom Eddie’s cars. Unfortunately though, she did have a small bout of the barfing flu yesterday, but was fine today. I knew she was sick when she sat still and actually let me hold her. It’s a rare occurrence, let me tell you. So, she threw up once in her crib, and then slept for the rest of the night with no issues. She was absolutely fine this morning, thank goodness. I was told yesterday that they plan on moving her in to the toddler room at daycare next month, since she is so verbal and already eats with a spoon. I know that she’s smart, but she’s just so little still. I’m not sure how I feel about it.

Not a whole lot more to report today. I’m starving, so I’m going to eat my Lean Cuisine and get back to work. I’m hoping to post Christmas and birthday pictures this weekend, as well as pictures of our trip to the children’s museum on New Years Day.

Way late Halloween Photos of Crazy Buzz Lightyear and a very sad giraffe.