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More about Baby Names, and please help me

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At this point in all of my other pregnancies, my baby was named.  Maybe with some questions about the middle name, but always named.  I’m not entirely sure what the problem is this time around, especially because I am a preparer by nature.  I think of these babies though, and what their names are, and my mind goes blank and I go in to a mild panic.  I just have no idea! Maybe because this is my last shot at naming babies I am putting too much pressure on myself.  I sort of want their names to be perfect.  Ed is not being helpful, ever since the great Melissa debate.  He says that my dislike of the name, even though I did agree and allowed for Millie as a nickname, has ruined it for him.  He wants me to come up with names, and then he will agree or disagree.  I want an active 2-sided discussion.  None of this is happening.

So this leaves me making lists both in my head and on paper, and crossing things off, both mentally and for real, and mostly feeling like we will never ever name these babies.


I’ve been calling them Thurston and Reba since Tuesday.  Just for fun, in a “we would NOT EVER call our kids this” kind of way.  I have to call them something other than Baby Girl and Baby Boy.

I guess now is the time for a list.

Here are names that I/we like that cannot be used:

  • Olivia -issue with our last name
  • Abby/Abigail- bad association from a good 12 years ago, and  our good friends’ daughter’s name.
  • Genevieve- Ed hates it
  • Vivienne- Ed hates it
  • Eleanor-was my grandmother’s name and she and Ed had a…stormy relationship.  Also my cousin has a baby Eleanor.
  • Henry- we just aren’t feeling it anymore.  It doesn’t lend itself to shortening/nicknaming which I am fond of (and NO to Hank)
  • Benjamin- Bad association from high school, sounds weird with our last name.
  • Samuel- Niece who spends a lot of time here, is Samantha who goes by Sam/Sami

Here are the names I have been kicking around as of late in no particular order:


  • Elizabeth
  • Molly
  • Ruby
  • Leah
  • Lauren
  • Lily
  • Lyla
  • Julia
  • Jane


  • William
  • Andrew
  • Carter

So, yeah.  Maybe I should copy this whole post and email it to Swistle to dissect. Or maybe I should really just name them Thurston and Reba.  They would be fairly unique for sure!

Or maybe you all should just name my babies!

Yes, I vote for that option.

21 responses »

  1. I love Lauren! And Carter! I also loooove Linnea for a girl name, but realized I can’t give mine any name starting with L, because then my kids’ initials, oldest to youngest, would be F-M-L. So, uh, no. Maybe you can consider it instead?

  2. Twin names are overwhelming. I made a boy list and a girl list, and then I started looking for which ones would combine well with each other and seeing how I felt about the combinations. Sometimes I’d combine a name with a dozen other names and then think “Huh. I guess I don’t like that name and/or it’s not right for us, because I don’t like it with ANYTHING.”

    One way I reduced stress/frazzle a little was by sometimes pretending I was only naming one baby. Since Baby A was a girl, I’d say to myself, “I’m pregnant with a singleton girl. What shall we name her?”—and ONLY think of girl names. Then after awhile I’d go through my girl-name finalist list one by one and think, “I already had the little girl and named her ____; now I’m pregnant again, with a little boy. What shall we name him?”

  3. Ruby! Please use Ruby. It is so adorable. Of your boy names, none of them can go wrong with Ruby: Ruby and William, Ruby and Andrew, Ruby and Carter. I think I like Ruby and Andrew the best, though, because they both have that long ‘u’ sound, so they match that way, and you could use Drew as a nickname. Ruby and Drew. Love it!

  4. Obviously I love the name Lyla, but on your girls list I also LOVE Jane! Jane is lovely and I think it goes well with your other kids names.

  5. Julia stands out for me on your girl list. I think it’s a really good match with your other kids’ names. I love Ruby and Molly for their cuteness.

  6. I love carter!!! One of my fave boy names!!

  7. I still vote Olivia. She can change it when she gets married. Or not. Or maybe she’ll love it and be glad for a fun association. Or go by her middle name. Or identify as make and change her name to Hank.

    Okay, FINE. Elizabeth and Benjamin.

  8. I’m still a fan of Carter (our boy name if we had one). I do love Ruby (my great grandmother’s name) and Rita (my grandmother’s name). Though I think Jane and William make great twin names.

    How about this list of twins?

  9. I vote for William and either Lauren or Julia.

  10. Jane and William.

    (p.s. Where I live, Carter is super crazy popular in the under age 4 crowd … so for me, that would make me stay away from it.)

  11. I would do 2 syllables for the girl name since your other girls have 2 syllable names and I’m weird like that. Lyla and Leah sound perfect with the other two, and I’d use Jane for the middle. I am awful at boy names but Andrew was in my (pathetically short) list before we knew A was a girl.

  12. I once dated a guy who was a twin. His name was Glen, AND HIS SISTER’S NAME WAS GLENDA. TFS.

    • My grandmother, Stella, had an identical twin sister named Ella.

      In more recent times, my husband thought it was PERFECTLY FINE to name our second child Keira/Kiera when our son is named Kieran. (Spoiler: Our daughter’s name is not Kiera.)

  13. (I feel pressure to suggest the perfect names now, since I suggested Millie as a nickname for Melissa! 😉 )

    Swistle has good advice for twin situations, and good guidelines on her site to peruse for sibling names. I think especially with boy/girl twins, you have the most naming freedom, as long as the names aren’t ridiculous together.

    From a practical standpoint, I would strike Elizabeth and Carter from your list because those would give you repeating initials. But if you LOVE those names, they’d each repeat with an opposite sex sibling, so if initialed items were color-coordinated, it might not be an issue. But I’m lazy/impatient that way and would veto the names just to avoid any potential squabbles down the road.

    Either William or Andrew gives you a two-syllable full name, and nickname options, complementing Eddie’s name. Solid choices you could take to the delivery room and see which fits!

    For the girls, you have a pretty consistent style coming through, so you could look for the mild outliers to narrow it down. Ruby is a DARLING name, but it stands out to me as the quirkiest choice, especially next to Caitlyn and Hannah, which seem far more recognizable. (Not a reason to abandon it; just my opinion/impression…and possibly my reaction to being a “Ruby” when my little sister was a “Hannah” and OMG the drama for a few years there about never finding “Ruby” monogrammed anywhere) Leah may come with a pronunciation question: one syllable or two? LAY-ah or LEE-ah or Lee? etc. Lily doesn’t go as well with William in the sibset. Molly feels more like a nickname than a proper name. Julia and Jane don’t match the rhythm of all your other kids’ names. Lauren and Lyla seem the best “match”es overall. That narrows your list…IF you want to stick to a pattern.

    …I fear I am not really helping with the overwhelm.

    My next two suggestions to get you closer, esp with the girls’ names, is to give your husband the list so far and make him rank his top three, at least. Then take those names, sit with them a while, and go to the sibling suggestions in the Baby Name Wizard for all, to see if they bring to mind some other candidates. Hopefully that will help something bubble to the top for you both.

    And finally, I can tell you from experience that you CAN bring a baby home from the hospital without a name. Our boys were named on Day 7 and Day 6, respectively. My husband will NOT discuss baby names seriously until the baby actually EXISTS.

    Good luck, and congratulations!

  14. I love naming babies! After this one, we’ll be done, but I wish I could name dozens of babies.

    I have a LONG list of girl names I’m sad we’ll never get to use, so I’ll share with you!
    -Laurel (I really like Lauren, but as a child born in the mid-eighties, I seem to know a lot of Laurens, which makes me hesitant to love it. This is similar)
    -Sophia: I know it’s really popular, but there is something so classic about it
    -Julia/Juliet: I really like this choice, and I think that Jules is a lovely nickname

    Funny note: Hannah and Genevive were on my list of contenders as well, but Eleanor won out. I love that she has a nickname that she can go by, as well as a longer, more ‘grown up’ name.

    Boys: As we still have yet to settle on our baby’s name, I’m not going to share all, but I’m having such a hard time deciding, too. I think boys’ names can be so much harder. Why, I don’t know, but that’s been the case this time.

    Riley:LOVE this one, even though it’s grown in popularity
    Harris: Ok, so sort of an old man name, but I just love it for some reason.
    Tobias (Toby for short)
    Grayson: This one doesn’t work with our last name (ends in son, I don’t like the repeat) but I’m a fan.
    Miles: So, this is our front-runner, but I don’t mind sharing. I love the simplicity of it, but it’s not too quirky or too generic.
    Theodore: I like the idea of Theo as a nickname
    Gabriel: Gabe as a nickname. Again, nothing too quirky or generic (I grew up in the age of Ashley spelled 20 different ways, so while I’m not opposed to generic names, I do go for something a bit more individual. No offense to any Ashleys out there!)
    Peter: This one does trend toward more simple and reminds me of the retired set, but I’m still drawn to it.

    Again, funny note: Benjamin is still on our list, and I love Henry, but we won’t use it for a few reasons (Like you, I don’t like Hank as a nickname, and well, even though it was my great-grandfather’s name, and my brother’s middle, when you’re mom’s mister is that name, it just sort of ruins any allure)

    Good luck!

  15. I dunno. The hospital told me that I could NOT leave without naming the baby. Apparently, the rules have changed. ugh.

    I know why it’s so difficult to name the fourth (and fifth!). You’ve used all the “good” names already and going back over the same ground again and again of names you didn’t really agree to initially with the significant other–but now have to discuss AGAIN–is just plain EXHAUSTING.

    Love the names William and Andrew and Carter–but there are an awful lot of them out there (says the woman who ended up with #1 girl name Sophia for her fourth).

    I’m a big fan of Molly and Julia. Both of those were on our list at one point in time.

  16. Eleanor made me think of Evelyn. I’ve seen it around a bit and like it a lot. Maybe it would fit for you.

    My favs from your lists are Molly and Julia. I like Carter best from the boys list, and I think it fits nice with both of those girl names. Such a tough decision, and this is about 3 times as hard as naming a singleton I think.


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